


All but Forgotten

by Seraphy (BeautifulViolence)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, 進撃の巨人 | Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan (Movies)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Levi loves from afar, Mikasa is eighteen bc Levi needs a good loving, Mmm Mmm Sex, Romance, Sex, Sexual Tension, Violence, levimika - Freeform, rikasa, rivamika
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:47:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25880803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeautifulViolence/pseuds/Seraphy
Summary: After saving Mikasa nine years ago, Levi chose to watch over her from afar. Now that she and Eren have joined the Levi squad, his good deed all but forgotten, Levi struggles with new challenges: How to best control his jealousy of Eren...and how to best keep his own hands off Mikasa.+ ARTWORK by Me!: COVER ART (Ch.1) plus BONUS ART (Ch. 6, 7, 8, and 9!) Enjoy!! =)Part 2:Yet Never to Remember
Relationships: Mikasa Ackerman & Levi, Mikasa Ackerman/Levi
Comments: 66
Kudos: 170





	1. NINE YEARS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **All but Forgotten coverart by me! (Seraphy). Enjoy!**

* * *

He had saved her once. 

That was why Levi recognized her right away.

Lucky for him, Mikasa didn't seem to remember him. Or, if she did, she gave no sign of it. At the far end of the room, Mikasa stared straight ahead with her gray eyes holding a familiar look of nothingness. It wasn't for lack of attention. She wasn't much of a talker yet remained highly aware of her surroundings, almost to a scary extent. Her hair was shorter than he remembered. The locks ending in the jagged cut of an amateur hand.

The intensity of his gaze drew her attention and he quickly looked down at his plate. He had eaten it clean long ago so Levi raised his cup to drink, finding it empty too. He played along anyway and pretended to drink.

If she forgot him, Levi decided it was a blessing. 

He realized he didn't want to be recognized. With his past being a vast wasteland paved by broken bodies and blood, he never felt like he deserved the little pride he got after saving her when she was only nine years old.

But had he _truly_ saved her?

What he should have done was cut down those kidnapping motherfuckers dead when he had confronted them. Severed the assholes' spines like he'd done with so many fallen titans that had dared stand in his path. 

But he hadn't.

How could he have known those men would return later that night to finish the job?

+++

**NINE YEARS AGO**

It was Mikasa's curiosity that drew the monsters in the first place. 

  
A handful of months shy of his twenty fifth birthday, Levi had just finished his assignment (deliver intel to one of the drunken fool of a commanders overseeing Shinganshina's lax patrols) when he decided to stop at the stream that ran through the wooded outskirts of the city. He leaned against a trunk of solid pine, bored, as he waited for his horse to finish drinking when he spotted her on the opposite side.

The little dark-haired girl giggled as she plucked flower after flower. She was oblivious to his presence. It was obvious she had strayed too far from the farmhouse in the distance, farther than any responsible parent would have allowed, to pick the fragrant pink and scarlet zinnias growing beside the stream.

  
Levi stared at the farmhouse and wondered why any family would choose to live so far away from Shinganshina's bustling center. His eyes needed only to drift to the wall in the distance for him to realize why; the walls were a symbol of safety yet they made even large pieces of land feel suffocating and tiny.  


"I like your horse," a small voice said.

  
Levi blinked to find the girl staring at him across the stream. He didn't give his name instead asking, "Where are your parents?"  


"My mom's in bed. She hasn't been feeling well for the past few weeks. I'm picking flowers to cheer her up!" She held up her bounty of wildflowers.

  
That made him smile, albeit it was short-lived. He knew from experience that an illness that lasted more than a few days was never a good sign. 

"Don't stay out too long," Levi said. The girl nodded happily before returning back to her task.

He was preparing to saddle up when he heard the low rumble of wheels. A testament to his Scout training, Levi immediately hugged his back to a tree but found no need. He had positioned himself well. Anyone coming down the path wouldn't be able to see him due to the heavy line of trees.  


He watched with narrowed eyes as the travelers passed by, unaware of his presence. Normally a horse drawn cart of merchants wouldn't have given him pause but it's their reaction that did it. Upon spotting the girl alone in the field, the driver nudged his partner before drawing the horses to a stop. He wasn't sure exactly what made him do it, but Levi drew both his blades and stepped out from beneath the cover of the trees.  


The men yelped in surprise and blanched at the sight of his blades, but Levi was too busy looking at the girl to notice.  


"It's late," he called to her. "Go home."  


The sun was still an hour from sunset but she nodded obediently. The girl spun in place, a flurry of dark hair spilling flowers onto the grass before sprinting home.  


When she was far enough away, he turned back to the men with a scowl: "State your business."  


The driver and his companion eyed his Scout uniform with the usual degrees of apprehension and suspicion he was accustomed to seeing from the merchant class.  


"We're farmers... looking to sell tomatoes at Shinganshina."  


Levi stared at the cargo they had stacked high in the truck bed. Nothing unusual stood out at a glance. Crates of bruised red fruit sat among wooden boxes. The boxes were larger than ones you'd expect to hold tomatoes, though. And there was rope. Bundles upon bundles of it.  


"What's the rope for?" Levi asked, nodding. "There hasn't been cattle out here for centuries."  


A third man poked his head up from the truck bed then. "It's--It's for firewood!" he cried shrilly. "We collect and sell firewood..we need the rope to tie up the bundles."  


The third man's presence had caught Levi by surprise, but he kept his face emotion-less as if he had known the man was there all along. The trio seemed to share a nod of agreement before turning back to him. Something about the nervousness on their faces made Levi want to interrogate them more, but his reasons for doing so were fading. The girl had made it home. She was safe.  


"Then keep moving," he barked.  


Relieved, The driver snapped his reins and spurred the horses onward.

Levi stayed long enough to watch them leave before he mounted his horse to continue his journey in the opposite direction. A short ride down the road he flagged down a familiar man on horseback. Levi knew him to be the town doctor who went by the name Grisha; he had seen him tending to the others in Shinganshina on previous visits. He requested a check up on the girl's ailing mother and gave him directions to the little farmhouse.  


Levi had slept easy that night. And every following night that week. But when he woke one morning and heard word of a massacred family that orphaned a little girl named Mikasa from the outskirts of Shinganshina, the story passed around like bread over morning chow, he hadn't slept a peaceful night since.


	2. UNDESERVING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi hadn't meant to spy on Eren and Mikasa. It was just a matter of him being caught in the wrong place at the wrong time.
> 
> * * *

This was the spot.

Levi landed on the sturdy branch with a sigh of relief. His ODM gear clunked as he dropped on his haunches, happy to find salvation so near to the encampment in one of the higher trees. The supply runners that were supposed to bring them their evening military rations were two hours late today. This caused such an outcry at camp that Levi could barely hear himself think. He drank in the silence like a luxury wine before removing a crumpled pack from his back pocket, tapping out a cigarette, and lighting it. He took a deep, well deserved drag.

It was funny. As a kid, Levi used to hate silence. Every moment of quiet brought back an unpleasant onslaught of memories; his mother's last breath, how skeletal his hands became as he slowly starved to death, waiting for someone--anyone to check on her and realize she was dead. Only, no one came.

The world was beginning to fade away, the walls of his childhood closing in when, luckily, a noise drew him back to the present. Voices, familiar ones.

"Mikasa, wait!" Eren's voice.

Listening carefully, Levi picked out two sets of boots clomping below. One set was light and impatient, blazing ahead as if on a warpath while the second, heavier set slipped and slid around as if he was being half-dragged.

"Hold on, will you!" The inevitable whine in Eren's voice rose, "Mikasa, where are we going?"

The footsteps came to a stop beneath his tree. "This is far enough," he heard her say.

  
With only a single night that separated the living from the many who would die painfully tomorrow, it wasn't hard for Levi to guess what the two were up to wandering alone. Whenever tensions ran high, so did other needs.

So why did it still surprise him to see Mikasa yank down her scarf and rush Eren, pressing her mouth against his. Better yet, why did seeing this bother Levi so much?

He was in no means a prude but felt the need to look away. _I should leave_ , he thought.

He ground his cigarette butt dead against the bark, trying to imagine he was doing the same to that odd, unpleasant tight feeling in his chest, when he heard a shuffle below and Eren's curt tone:

"No," he said. "I'm sorry, Mikasa. I can't. I need to focus on tomorrow."

Grudgingly, Levi had to admit the kid was right. Relationships among the team only spelled trouble; coordinating perfect attacks on titans were difficult enough without adding a lover's quarrel into the mix.

But the hurt was obvious in Mikasa's voice as she whispered, "Okay."

A low clanging rose from the camp nearby.

"That's the dinner bell!" Eren shouted, clearly relieved. "Let's head back."

"I'm..." she paused. "I'm going to stay out here a little longer."

"Alright. Well...I'll see you back at the camp then?"

Whether or not Eren knew she was upset didn't seem to matter to him. The boy saw the opportunity to escape, so he did. His footsteps came and went quicker than a heartbeat.

Levi sighed and mentally debated whether or not he would wait for Mikasa to leave before he used his ODM to get back toward the barracks but then he heard her gasp. He looked down again to see Mikasa slump to her knees with her head buried in her hands. Her rounded shoulders shook and made her look small, vulnerable. She was crying.

Levi activated his ODM gear and leapt to the ground where he landed softly beside her. "Get up," he said. "It's time to head back."

Mikasa lifted her head in surprise. "Captain?" She quickly wiped the tears from her face but her eyes were still puffy and red."Were you there the entire time?" She asked shakily.

When he didn't answer, she continued, "So you heard everything."

"Barely. You two woke me up from a nap," he lied. Better to spare her feelings if it would cause less grief. "Get up and get going. Or Sasha will take your plate."

"I can't." She breathed and shook her head, drawing back into herself. "I can't face him right now."

"Fine," He said, grabbing her arm to pull her to her feet. "You can eat with me then. There's a package of salt pork sandwiches that the runners left in my tent. Probably knew I would chew their heads off otherwise."

Mikasa hesitated, but at the mention of a delicacy like pork, her stomach growled and her feet moved to follow him.

**+++**

Levi's tent was spacious enough that he considered it more a "room" than a tent. It had been a loaner he'd gotten from Erwin, which he'd only accepted after Erwin showed him that he had his own tent, only larger and with three rooms. Courtesy, he said, of good connections with sympathizing nobles within Wall Sina.

While usually only a handful would get drunk at dinner, it sounded like the entire team caved. He could hear an uproar of laughter followed by pockets of off-key singing sometimes. Mikasa seemed to hear them too, pausing to listen between bites of her sandwich.

"You can join them," he offered.

She shook her head. "I'd rather not." Soon enough, she'd retreat back into herself in silence.

A shadow appeared at the tent's entrance. From the silhouette, Levi knew it was Hange. "Captain Levi!" she shouted.

Mikasa rose to her feet to excuse herself but Levi raised a hand to motion for her to stay seated. He crossed over to the tent flap and drew it open.

"Hiya, Captain!" Hange appeared, her beaming face a flush red. She swayed side to side on unsteady feet.

She had obviously joined in tonight's festivities. Levi felt oddly disappointed. But he wasn't sure if it was because he had expected better of her to allow herself to get to this state or because he had been the only senior commanding officer to miss out.

Levi glanced behind Hange's shoulder and spotted two half-naked figures leaving the barracks. He recognized Sasha's long wavy locks right away. He couldn't remember how many times he had to kick her out of the kitchens in the dead of night because she had snuck in to eat the leftover cheese heels. She streaked past in a blur wearing only her bra and battle pants. The boy hot on her heels, however, was Eren. Levi felt his jaw clench. The alcohol seemed to have loosened the boy's resolve to focus solely on the fight tomorrow. He could barely walk straight and only just managed to keep up with Sasha as she led him deeper into the cover of the trees.

_Shit. What if Mikasa sees.._

Levi quickly glanced back to her. Luckily, Mikasa's eyes were closed as she chewed slowly to savor the last bite of crust on her sandwich. He suppressed an internal sigh of relief.

Hange grabbed his shoulder to steady herself. "We need more firewood."

Levi narrowed his eyes at her and wondered why she was asking him and not one of the rookies. _Is she so wasted that she's forgetting who she's talking to?_

Mikasa stepped forward quickly. "I'll bring some right away, Commander." She brushed the crumbs off her shirt and skimmed past them to head outside.

Levi watched Mikasa engage her ODM gear and leap back towards the forest to where they had stacked the extra firewood.

"She's a good girl, she is." Hange said before yawning loud. "What was she doing in your tent?" Her hands gripped Levi's shoulders as she gave him a sly smile. "Isn't eighteen a little young for you?"

He ignored the jab and rolled his eyes. "She wanted to discuss something with me." But that wasn't true, unless you counted chewing as talking.

Levi stared at the darkness where Mikasa disappeared and frowned, realizing something. It was the same direction that Sasha and Eren had gone. Levi cursed under his breath.

_She's heading right after them!_

"Captain?" Hange asked lightly. "What's wrong?"

"Stay here and watch the others, Hange," He commanded. It was no use suggesting she come along when she was so drunk she'd likely swing head-first into a tree. "Make sure they don't do anything foolish."

Levi ran for the forest, engaging his ODM gear mid-jump. Hange uttered something at his back, but he didn't catch it. He hoped he could catch Mikasa in time.

**+++**

_This is none of my business_ , he knew. _So why am I doing this?_

Levi couldn't give himself an answer nor could he help himself. He barreled through the trees, painfully aware of the darkness and how it blunted his senses. Still, Mikasa was out here and she couldn't have gotten far.

 _I don't want to see her broken again._ He reasoned to himself, _I would do this for Hange too._

But that was a lie. He barely knew his soldiers outside of what they could provide on the battlefield. If Hange had a lover or a husband, he had no idea even after knowing her all these years. When it came to illnesses of the heart or dreams or hopes, Levi knew nothing of what his squad wanted and he didn't care to ask. He considered dreams and hopes as useful as using toothpicks to fight the titans.

**+++**

And just like before, just when she needed him, Levi was too late.

The damage was done.

He found Mikasa standing as still as if she were carved from stone. She was pale, frozen to the spot where she stood on the tree that overlooked the mountainous firewood pile. Her eyes seemed to be locked on what was going on behind it. Levi couldn't see what she was seeing, but he could imagine the scene just by the sounds they made. Sasha's moans growing steadily louder, Eren's panting becoming more persistent and desperate. The wet slap of flesh urgently meeting flesh.

Just as he had once done when they had faced off the female titan, Levi charged at Mikasa and took her away from what he knew would hurt her.  
He curled his arm around her waist and his ODM gear quickly propelled them back into darkness, but he knew he had been too late. She had seen enough.

Levi sighed, feeling Mikasa's body quake as she tried her best to muffle her sobs. Returning her back to the camp in this condition was not an option. She'd have no privacy, no way to grieve. Without sleep, she would be in no shape to fight tomorrow. He'd have to take her to another part of the woods and let her cry it out.

He felt her shift, trying to force her way out of his grasp. She uttered something but his ODM gear had retracted with a loud zip that drowned out her voice.

"What did you say?" He asked.

"Let me go," Mikasa repeated. Her hands flew to his fingers, trying to wrench them off her waist.

He winced as her nails raked his knuckles but gripped her tighter. "Stop moving, or you'll fall."

"Just let me fall!"

Levi should have been prepared when he saw her arm move and then saw the flash of metal --moonlight reflecting off a one-edged blade-- divide the darkness. A moment later, the wire attached to the ODM gear on his right thigh went slack. His eyes widened in disbelief.

 _She cut it_! he realized.

And in seconds, they were falling.

Levi immediately engaged the ODM gear on his left side just in time to attach them to the nearest tree. The claw clung briefly as they swung downwards toward the trunk, but the device was only meant to take half his weight. It snapped off the moment they hit the trough of the swing and sent them tumbling over the ground, limp as ragdolls.

When his body finally came to a stop, Levi groaned and pushed himself onto his knees. His right knee and elbow seemed to have absorbed most of his fall and both stung like a bitch. Levi almost welcomed the pain because at least that meant he was still alive. He flexed his elbow slowly and then his knee, relieved to find nothing broken.

"I'm sorry," Mikasa whispered beside him.

Remembering what happened, Levi found himself staggering over to her. He grabbed a fistful of her cloak and wrenched it up to shout in her face. "Are you crazy? You nearly killed us both!"  
Mikasa opened her mouth as if to say something, but her head dropped as she began to sob so hard she could barely breathe.

 _You brat._ Levi thought. He felt his anger dissipate and loosened his grip on her cloak. Instead of moving away, Mikasa's hands reached for him and drew him close enough that her cheek was pressed against his chest. What she sought was comfort, he knew. As Captain, he felt obligated to give it. Though, he knew the warm feeling in his chest at the prospect of touching her had nothing to do with duty. His arms closed tightly around her, knowing full well she was wishing he was Eren.

When she tucked her head beneath his neck and he could feel her breath on his skin, Levi swallowed hard. He felt a sudden urge to twist his fingers into her hair and pull her onto him, crush his lips against hers with a hunger that Eren would never have. He could picture it; his callused hands, honed by swordplay, would roam her body and easily find the buttons that needed to be undone and tear away any seams that needed to be torn away. He would taste the bare skin from her collar down past her stomach and give her all the pleasure she needed to forget her sorrows of today. She'd forget her own name when she climaxed against his tongue. If only she'd let him.

But then she whispered, "Why?...Why did Eren choose her over me?"

This question made Levi's resolve wane. Now, one part of him urgently wanted to leave. It wanted him to stand up and ODM his way back to his tent. It wanted to abandon her as well as all the other confusing feelings she incited to course through him. The other, more irrational part of him wanted to stay, to be here when she needed him because Levi had sworn not to make the mistake of abandoning her again. What Levi wouldn't give to have another titan to be on their side. God knows, Eren deserved having the shit kicked out of him again. Hell, he'd even openly enjoy doing it this time.

"He doesn't deserve you," He sighed.

He felt Mikasa nod and mutter what sounded like 'thank you'. Levi held her until she stopped crying and stroked his fingers through her hair until she drifted off into sleep.

As the sun began to rise, hovering higher and higher into the sky, he peered down at Mikasa. Up close, he noticed many surprising details he hadn't before; her lashes were long, a sprinkle of light freckles dusted her nose, her lips were a natural subtle pink. Peaceful in sleep, she looked more like that innocent, child version of herself that he had first met. He watched her sleep, watched her chest rising and falling with slow breaths and knew he had done the right thing by staying.

He meant what he had said. Eren didn't deserve her. Not in a year, not in a million years. Even if the kid managed to wipe titans off the face of the earth like he always claimed someday. He didn't deserve Mikasa.

 _But,_ Levi thought, _I do._

========

**++ Like what you're reading? Let me know! Kudos/Bookmark/or leave a comment down below! ++**

With Much Love, Seraphy =)


	3. DISTRACTED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> || CHAPTER WARNING :: EXPLICIT CONTENT: GRAPHIC SEX SCENE AHEAD ||
> 
> Mikasa wakes Captain Levi in need of a distraction.

**|| CHAPTER WARNING :: EXPLICIT CONTENT: GRAPHIC SEX SCENE AHEAD ||**

  
Only in sleep would he have opened himself to being caught off guard.

The brush on his lips would have woken anyone, but Levi took it a step further. He tossed his assailant to the floor and threw his full weight on them. He woke up to his hand gripping Mikasa's throat and realized what had happened: she had kissed him.

He blinked to take everything in. "Mikasa?" 

Inches below his hand her shirt was unbuttoned, exposing a lacy white bra. He was certain her shirt had been fastened to the top button last night. So she must have undone it herself. Levi looked at the want in her eyes and knew she saw the same in him too.

Long ago Levi had decided to abstain from allowing himself any enjoyment. A timed punishment he deemed fit to account for every soldier he lost in his squad. Soon enough, he found the bodies began to pile up until he had doomed himself to a life-long sentence of going without.

Like Mikasa, he had starved his body of everything but hunger.

If she sought a distraction, who was he to deny her? He could only starve himself for so long.

Once his mouth found hers, he slipped his tongue in to caress hers. Levi left the hand at her throat, instead using his free hand to push under her bra to force it up and out of the way. He rolled the soft plum-colored peaks of her breasts beneath his fingers until they stiffened and felt her gasp against his mouth.

"Take off your pants," he commanded.

Mikasa nodded and kicked them off easily enough. She began to unbutton his shirt to pull it off as his hand wound between her legs and found her sex. He felt a deep satisfaction as he thumbed the damp fabric covering it, uttering a gutteral noise at the realization: _Fuck, she's so wet._

He stroked the base of his thumb up and down her folds through the thin cotton as she moaned into his neck, "Ohh, Fuck..." 

He rarely ever heard Mikasa curse which made it even more exciting to hear.

Levi pushed her back and settled himself between her legs. He grabbed her underwear and pulled it to the side and without a pause, extended his tongue to lick her pink folds. Mikasa shivered on contact and made a sound that vaguely resembled his name. He smirked and took it as an invitation to continue with a second, harder lick. 

She was too shy to meet his eyes at first. Every time she shied away from his gaze, his hand would find her chin and turn it back to him. Her cheeks would flush as her gray eyes met his blue ones. "Look at me," he said.

He stuck his index and middle into his mouth and started slowly with easing his index in first. Initially, her body resisted but when he swept his thumb over her clit a few times, he was able to work it inside her. When he was able to ease in his middle as well in a snug fit, he began to stroke them inside her in an upward motion. Her response alone-- a high-pitched moan and nails scraping down his shoulders-- was a reward in itself.

His erection strained painfully against his pants. But Levi ignored it with the mental promise to address it soon enough. He wanted to take care of Mikasa first. It almost felt like he had to prove a point.

Mikasa's legs began to tense as he slowly lapped, her thighs closing around his head in a vice. Her hips urgently rocked against his mouth. She wanted more and he took pleasure in drawing it out by pausing, denying her little by little.

Levi was relishing every moan brought by a flick of his tongue so much that he barely heard the sound of footsteps in time.

"Captain Levi?"

Another, different voice followed from nearby. They were somewhere below. "Captain Levi, are you here?"

Levi clamped a hand over Mikasa's mouth to muffle her moans. She squirmed in pleasure as he continued to curl his fingers in harder strokes inside her. He could feel her contracting around him even tighter now. She was close. Too close. He couldn't stop now.

"Captain Levi!" A voice called from below. They were closer now.

He sighed. He'd have to answer or soon they'd deploy the whole team to look for him.

"I'm up here," he called loudly, staring into Mikasa's eyes. He quickly added, "Save your gas. I'll be down in a minute and will meet you at camp."

"Yes, sir!"

He didn't even need the whole minute. 

The moment they were gone, he lowered his head to resume. He only needed to stroke his tongue over the sensitive bud of her clit twice, pistoning his wet fingers to meet the same pace, when Mikasa arched her back and came. Loudly too, for an unusually quiet girl. He roughly gripped her thighs and continued to lap at her sweet juices as she whimpered, riding his tongue in wave after pleasurable wave.

When she finally caught her breath, Mikasa palmed the taut tent of his erection, looking to return the favor. "Wait," she breathed.

Reluctantly, Levi stopped her hand. "We'll continue this after," he said.

Whether 'after' would happen with the real possibility of one of them or both of them ending up dead, he didn't say.

* * *

**++ Like what you're reading? Let me know! Bookmark/kudos/comment down below! ++**

With Much Love, Seraphy =)


	4. KINDLING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The absence of Captain Levi and Mikasa at morning chow doesn't go unnoticed

_[[ Shout out to Mebbster for being my first commenter! This one's for you :) ]]_

**|| CHAPTER WARNING: SPOILERS! ||**

***SPOILER WARNING*: Contains info from the 'No Regrets' OVA with Erwin's and Levi's Backstory**

* * *

It wouldn't do to have both of them arrive back at camp at the same time so he sent Mikasa off first. Only then did he look down, remembering that he was short a functional ODM gear. Just as well, he would report to the armory first to fix it and rejoin everyone much later at afternoon chow.

**+++**

It was a quarter past noon when Levi reached the hovel of reinforced walls they had chosen as a makeshift armory. His hand went for the handle and noted the smudges on his knuckles. Another odd residual effect of Mikasa; his usual obsession with cleanliness dulled for the time he was around her. That usually never happened unless he was on the field. There wasn't much choice when he was steeped in so much blood he didn't know how much was his or anyone else's.

"Levi," Erwin greeted him, his voice like the low strum of a guitar. 

The commander stood before a line of rifles along the wall, armed with a clipboard. He was inventorying the stock. Connie, another Scout from Eren's class, was doing the same only checking off a list of fabric goods instead.

Levi wasn't surprised to see the Commander there. After losing an arm, the guy seemed even more hell-bent on making himself useful. Even if they somehow managed to take both of Erwin's legs, Levi doubted he'd stay in one place too long. Indomitable will. An admirable trait befitting a commander.

"How is Mikasa?" he asked.

Levi came to a sudden stop, hesitating. _How did he know?_

Erwin continued, "You didn't report this morning. Hange mentioned she'd last seen you following Mikasa into the forest with something urgent." His tone was casual in its concern, "Was everything alright?"

Relieved, Levi sighed. It wasn't an interrogation. He was merely curious. However, he noticed the absence of pencil scratch; Connie had stopped writing to listen.

"She's fine," Levi answered. "The usual interpersonal issues among the Scouts but nothing immediately concerning." He didn't delve too deeply into the story. The less he gave, the better. Levi looked around and remembered what he had come for."Do we have spare ODM spools? Left-tracked."

Commander Erwin nodded and crossed over to an open carton and pulled out a spool of wire. He handed it over to him, asking, "A sliced end. That happen last night?"

Levi nodded as he undid the clasps of his left ODM to replace the faulty wiring. The two step process to repair what served as his literal life-line on the battlefield was uncomfortably simple to him.

"I'll see you at afternoon chow," Erwin replied. "We'll be attacking at five."

**+++**

Four hours, tops. That's all the sleep he must have gotten, if his headache had any say.

Levi was draining his second cup of coffee when a half-eaten tray of food clattered in the space opposite of him at the table. Hange peered down with a glowing, wide smile. Going by the bites taken out of the bread, she must have gotten impatient while waiting for him to arrive.

"Levi," she greeted.

"Hange," he answered.

God, he had hoped a hangover would have left her with too hazy a memory of last night to ask questions. Or, to have at least dulled her loud personality a fraction today. But who was he kidding? He preferred Hange's sunniness over his gloominess any day.

"So?" She asked in a whisper, her eyebrows hopping. "What happened last night?"

Levi's eyes flit around the room until he was sure they weren't being overheard. "Eren and Sasha had a...rendezvous in the forest. I tried to spare Mikasa the scene. I was too late."

Hange's eyes softened, "Oh."

She took a seat, frowning. It didn't take a seasoned Titanologist to spot the doting way Mikasa looked at Eren. They had all heard the story about what happened to them long ago.  
She handed him her cup of coffee and he gratefully accepted.

"I took her to a place to compose herself," he explained as he stirred in creamer. "We parted ways after that."

"Well, that's a surprise. She came in this morning and told Connie she hadn't seen a hair of you." _Shit_ , Levi thought. Mikasa hadn't known Hange had seen him go after her.

No use backtracking. He shrugged. "I'm not sure why she'd say that."

_Was it shame?_

He glanced at Mikasa now where she always sat by Eren's side. It was the first time today that he had allowed himself to do so.

They seemed to be sharing a quiet conversation among themselves. Quiet and reserved, Mikasa looked down as she spoke. Eren seemed agitated and pushed around his mashed potatoes with a spoon. At one point she placed a placating hand on his shoulder but he knocked it away, shaking his head.

Levi grit his teeth. _Petulant, like a child._

As much as he disliked Eren, he hated the yearning look Mikasa gave the boy even more.

"Anything else happen?"

"No." Levi downed the coffee and immediately regretted it. It was hot enough to burn his taste buds to shit. Perhaps Mikasa didn't want to be associated with him. There was the veritable age gap. Not knowing the reason bothered Levi more than he cared to admit.

"Curious that nobody saw either of you until late this morning," Hange pressed. "Mikasa sought a refill for a single dull blade. You came in to replace a broken wire, sliced through." Abnormally astute, the woman's eyes missed nothing. It was impressive. 

Forever the scientist, forever the world before her must be examined.

Mikasa rose from her seat to leave. She was upset, but hid it well; her trembling bottom lip stilled to a stern line, her jaw relaxed from where she unclenched her teeth. She knew exactly where Levi sat even without looking at him, but her eyes only flowed from the floor to the exit as if to avoid him completely. When she had gone, he noticed Eren staring at him with a strange, hostile intensity. It didn't matter to him how little or much the boy knew. If Eren wanted to confront him, Levi was looking forward a fight. Of course, as Captain he would show a little restraint first. He'd tell the boy to piss off, but any second remark that came after made him fair game.

"It's not my place, Captain, but is what you're doing wise if Eren and her are a thing?"

He cut in smoothly. "They aren't."

"Eren might not see it that way." She pressed. "It may encourage him to use his powers against us. Against _you_."

Levi didn't know why Hange brought the fear up now. The threat of Eren attacking his own comrades in titan form wasn't new. The cut on Mikasa's face was a prime reminder. "If that happens, I'll do what I have to with every titan," he said. "I'll cut him down to size."

Frankly, Levi didn't fear death anymore. Not after the deaths of Isabel and Furlan. Those two would be the first to greet him in the afterlife; Isabel gushing over how he'd cut the Titan who'd eaten them both into millions of ribbons. Furlan then asking him why the hell it took him so long to get here when he had ODM gear. Levi smiled to himself. Yes, he would welcome death with open arms even today if it was his time. Until then, he'd fight as if the titans were the last gatekeepers keeping him from hell.

* * *

**++ Like what you're reading? Let me know! Kudos/Bookmark/Comment down below! ++**

With Much Love, Seraphy =)


	5. DECEPTION

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **|| CHAPTER WARNINGS||**  
>  **(1) **SEASON THREE SPOILERS AHEAD****  
>  **(2) SHORT 'MATURE' SEX SCENE; Eren and Mikasa are eighteen. Alright? Here we go!**  
>    
>  Chapter Summary *INCLUDES SEASON 3 SPOILERS*:  
>  Following Levi's hidden assault on the Beast Titan and the loss of the Scouts, he tries to seek a private place of solace only to accidentally walk in on Mikasa and Eren making up.

* * *

  
**8PM**  
**| THREE HOURS AFTER THE SCOUTS' SUICIDE CHARGE AND SURPRISE ASSAULT ON THE BEAST TITAN |**

  
The Beast titan had taken everything from him; Erwin, his Scouts, his last ounce of energy. Levi was surprised his heart still had the strength to beat.

By the time Mikasa had knocked him onto his back, pressing her blade to his neck, Levi had been rendered a former shell of the man who woke up beside her this morning. Looking into her eyes, he realized he was tired. Tired of it everything. Even breathing felt like a burden.

 _Do it,_ he thought. _Get it over with already. Isabel and Furlan are waiting._

"Hand the serum over!" she'd shouted. 

And the look in her eyes told him that she'd done it as an empty threat. Disappointing.

Still, Levi had refused to give her the titan serum. Anyone who knew Levi knew better than to try to take anything from him by force. Surrendering was never a choice. If Erwin hadn't forced his hand in giving the serum to Armin, the book obsessed brat would have stayed a charred memory.

  
**+++**

Levi headed on foot to the tree that he'd discovered the first night they came. It was best to save the ODM gas for any skirmishes they might encounter along the way.

The loss of Erwin and the Scouts hit him especially hard. As if witness to the end of humanity as he knew it, Levi sought a quiet place to grieve. Tears no longer made an appearance in his life since Isabel and Furlan's passing, but he wanted to curl up in a dark corner and forget that the world existed for a while.

At some point he'd have to address the damned Mutineers, as he now referred to Eren and Mikasa. They were just another headache he had to address today. But they could wait.

The towering maple came into sight, greeting him, but Levi was also met with something equally unwelcome. Low grunts of a physical nature coming from a patch of bushes to his left. He recognized Eren's grunts and felt disgusted at the fact that he could place the sound.

 _Fuck the King_ , he thought. How far away did he have to go to be alone here?

Eren wasn't alone, it seemed. Intertwining with the groans were quiet whimpers that must belong to Sasha.

Furious, he stomped over to the bush and swat it aside. Right that same moment he remembered seeing Sasha asleep at camp recovering from her head wound.

"Will you two--" He meant to say _'Piss off and fuck somewhere else_ ', but his words stopped, caught in his throat.

Instead, he found Mikasa bobbing on her knees facing Eren's naked waist. Sweat plastered Eren's bangs to his forehead as he leaned against the tree with his pants around his ankles. His eyes were closed in concentration as both his hands twisted in the tangles of Mikasa's dark hair. Only she seemed to notice Levi arrive. Mikasa froze and turned to look at him in surprise. Her eyebrows knit together. Her gray eyes darkened with anguish and what even looked like sadness. 

Eren hadn't seen him yet and only noticing the pause, forced himself back between Mikasa's lips.

Levi's childhood had prepared him well for moments like this. In an instant, he stepped back from his thoughts and steeled his burdening anger and hurt so that he could deal with them later.

In result, he only looked at them with empty, unfeeling eyes.

Eren's eyes blinked open and finding the superior officer, they nearly popped out of their sockets. "Shit!" He tucked himself back in his pants and began to fumble with his belt, "Captain!"

Being addressed by his title made Levi remember who he was. He turned on his heel to go back the way he came. "Finish up and hurry back."

"Yes, sir!" Eren replied at his back, sounding smug.

Although he thought it impossible, Levi felt a dead weight grow heavier in his chest with every step. It was pain, he knew. But he was an idiot to expect Mikasa to see him any differently. She had been bawling over Eren only hours before she'd kissed him. What did he expect? The morning they shared meant nothing to her.

It should mean nothing to him.

They used each other for a release. That was all. It sounded convincing enough to fool anyone, but Levi was no fool.


	6. RESIGNATION

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The King has granted the Scouts a month-long reprieve of duty to recover and mourn. Vowing to see Mikasa one last time, Levi sets an ultimatum.
> 
> * * *

  
Following the tragic loss of nearly their entire regiment, the King granted the Scouts a temporary reprieve from duty. While new recruits were trained, the remaining Scouts were allowed a month off to live inside the recently reclaimed Wall Rose to recover, lick their wounds, and mourn their dead.

Due to their stations as senior officers, a townhouse was refit for he and Hange to act as officer quarters. Hange lived in the apartment directly adjacent to his and seemed to take every free night as an excuse to get drunk and celebrate.

**+++**

**THE MONTH REPRIEVE OF SCOUT DUTY (DAY 7)**

Hange was a force to be reckoned with. At the end of the first rest week, she took it as her solemn duty to drag Levi out to drink. As if a finger of whiskey would be enough to wash away his bloodied memory.

Now, an hour later after she had dragged him from his bed, he was back home. He was going to spend his evening exactly as usual. Only now, he happened to be dressed up in a black button down and matching slacks and nursing a huge headache.

Taverns were the first businesses to open back up in Wall Rose. It made the town livelier but now he had to deal with drunken bouts of singing throughout the night. He was setting a kettle of water to boil tea for his headache when he heard familiar shouts.

"Mikasa, where are you going?" By the way Eren's words were slurring, he was one drink away from courting the floor.

"Leave me alone!"

"No, tell me what you're doing out here!"

He heard Mikasa's voice again, coming closer. "Stop, Eren, you're drunk."

"Tell me where you're going!"

"Eren, stop! You're hurting me."

Levi yanked open his door and stepped out to find them standing in the square outside his complex. Eren gripped Mikasa's wrist so tightly his knuckles bled white. 

He glared at the boy before saying, "Mikasa, a word."

Mikasa looked up at him and seemed relieved when he nodded toward his apartment. Wrenching her wrist from Eren's grip, she slowly made her way up the stairs and passed him. He closed his eyes and briefly detected the earthy, vanilla-warm note of her skin. The thought that she still found him to be a sanctuary made Levi secretly happy.

But Eren was livid. "She's not going anywhere alone with you, you bastard!"

After the morning that he and Mikasa were discovered to be missing at the same time, rumors ran amok the Scouts as plentiful as the titans. The stories weren't half-bad either. Levi even enjoyed them because they pissed Eren off so much.

"If you don't recall, I am still your Captain during a rest period. Piss off."

Eren balled his hands into fists. "Screw you, you son of a--"

At that moment, Connie and Jean burst into the square holding pints of beer and singing at the top of their lungs. Arm wrapped around each others's shoulders, they spotted Eren first. 

"Heyyy!!" They shouted. They clapped a hand on his shoulder, spilling foaming beer down the shoulder of his shirt. When they spouted Levi, they dissolved into a happy, drunken drawn-out chorus of "Captaaaiiin!"

"Where have you been, Captain?" Jean asked. Then before waiting for an answer, asked, "Why don't you join us for a pint!"

"I'm good," Levi replied. "Now see Eren home. He's had enough."

"Like hell, I have!" he shouted.

Mikasa piped up in an effort to try to control the damage, "It's alright, Eren. I'll meet you back at the barracks."

"Go on," Levi commanded in a low tone. "Before you do something you'll regret."

Connie seemed to be the only one clear headed enough of the three to recognize the threat. He looped his arm around Eren's. "Come onnnnn, Mikasa is fine. She's more than able to take care of herself. Right, Jean?"

Jean didn't look so certain. But when Connie repeated himself, he took the hint and grabbed Eren's other arm.

It took both Connie and Jean to haul Eren away. He could still hear Eren shrieking around the corner, threatening to go into titan-form, but it was obvious he'd be too drunk to handle the transformation. Levi smirked after them and almost wished they'd let him try. God knew Levi needed a laugh after all the horrors he'd been through recently.

He closed the door. "Does he always grab you like that?"

Mikasa didn't answer and quietly rubbed the pink marks on her wrist. "Where have you been?"

He didn't want to explain his absence. Early on, Levi had stopped taking his meals with the rest of them. Depressed or not, he no longer saw a need to eat with them when his presence wasn't need to raise morale. Eren's smug face alone was enough to put Levi off whatever little food his diminishing appetite allowed.

"What were you two fighting about?" 

She side-stepped the question. "Hange told me where to find you. I wanted to apologize,"

He gave her a measured look. "Apologize for what?" 

He had long forgiven her "mutiny". It was to be expected when Armin was their best friend.

"For what you saw in the forest."

"You and Eren enjoying yourselves?" He asked. He was sorry he had to see it, too.

She cut in, "I wasn't... Or, I didn't." She looked suddenly self conscious, peering away before folding her arms in to clutch her elbow. "I never do... With Eren, it's always painful."

Levi knew Mikasa had no reason to lie.

Reflecting back, he remembered the scene. The stiffness of her jaw, the tears leaking from the edges of her eyes as Eren had yanked her hair to force more of himself into her mouth. What did she expect from a kid who took chunks out of his hand in order to transform? Pain was part of the process to him.

Just like all things in life, Eren only seemed to appreciate Mikasa was there when it aligned with his priorities. She was merely a pretty decoy who was more than willing to take all the abuse the world wanted to throw at him.

_Yet again another reason he doesn't deserve you_ , he thought.

"Why do it if you don't enjoy it?" he asked.

"I don't know why." She shrugged. "With him, I feel like I have no choice."

Levi didn't blame her for not seeing the obvious. The answer lay in the simple way she looked at Eren since day one: Blind devotion. Having someone save your life forged an immutable bond that was hard to pare from true love; it had that same intense longing to protect, to be by that person's side due to the unspoken debt that demanded to be paid. 

Levi had seen the same look before on Petra's face after he saved her once or twice. And how, just like Mikasa, she wanted much more than he could give at the time. He never sought to take advantage of it.

He had saved Mikasa a few times already. Not even including that day nine years ago.

Then it struck him, "Is that how you felt with me that morning? That you had no choice?"

"No!" she cried. Mikasa couldn't meet his eyes and stared hard at the table. "That's the only time I felt like I had one."

She seemed to be antsier than usual and Mikasa stood suddenly to cross over to the other side of the room. Levi watched her, admiring the gentle sway of her hips as she walked, and realized the kettle had begun to whistle. He was so worn out he hadn't even picked up on the sound.

He watched her take the jug of cold water from the counter and pour half its contents into the kettle to cool it to a drinkable temperature. Then she surprised him by adding two bags of jasmine tea. She knew his routine already after sharing one dinner with him. She was observant, much more than most.

It made him want her all that much more.

They passed the rest of the night speculating what would become of the Scouts now that their numbers had dwindled. After a time, Mikasa seemed to notice his fatigue begin to settle in. His replies were becoming fewer, more clipped, when she excused herself to leave.

Levi held the door as she left. He had full intentions to shut it behind her but the question slipped out as she passed him.

"Do you love Eren?"

It took Mikasa by surprise and she stopped in the doorway. "I...Of course I do. He's my family--"

He shook off her answer. She knew what he was asking. "Do you love him? More than family?"

"I'm...I'm not sure." Mikasa looked down at her shoes. She was embarrassed.

It wasn't what he wanted to hear. Levi knew this, yet still couldn't help himself. He couldn't let her go without trying to convince her the only way he knew how. Grabbing the tattered red scarf around her neck, a totem of Eren that he despised, he used it to pull her against him.

Levi kissed her gently even when Mikasa gasped and tried to press against him harder. He wanted to savor the moment to remember everything about her: the taste of her lips, the softness of her skin, the warmth of her body in his grasp. He wanted to savor it because he knew it would be the last time he would allow himself to have her.

He let her choose when to end the kiss. Then, with great difficulty, he hardened his voice along with his heart. "Mikasa, don't come back here again. Not until you know the answer."

Then Levi shut the door and turned his back on everything he loved.

Bonus art at the end as to not ruin the surprise.

* * *


	7. BLOODSHED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi happens to overhear Eren talking about Mikasa and, disliking what he hears, it leads to their final showdown.
> 
> * * *
> 
> **|| CHAPTER WARNINGS: **SEASON 3 SPOILERS AHEAD** ||**
> 
> Bonus Art by Me! Seraphy =) 
> 
> * * *

**THE MONTH REPRIEVE OF SCOUT DUTY (DAY 23 of 30)**

When he heard the knock on the door, Levi was there in an instant. He wrenched it open to find the tawny haired scientist standing there in the dark. She looked vaguely amused.

"Hange?" He tried not to look too disappointed.

"Captain, I have some troubling news to share."

"What is it?" He said, only to quickly ask, "Is it about Mikasa?"

Hange blinked rapidly. "Mikasa? No, she's fine. Why would--" She paused as the truth dawned on her. Levi cursed the scientist's quick analytical skills as well as the wide smile that blossomed on her face. "Levi do you--?"

"Just tell me the news, Hange."

She pursed her lips. "That's the thing, Levi. I'll give you the news on the condition that I tell it to you over a drink." When he continued to stare, she made a face. "There's only one week left to the reprieve. Let's make the most of it!"

Levi hesitated and looked back at his bed. He didn't have any other plans. After Hange left, Levi would only lie in bed, tossing and turning as he thought about Mikasa, restless.

"Hell, why not?" he replied.

Hange was nearly glowing as she shouted, "Woohoo!" She thrust her arms into the air to celebrate."Well, get dressed and let's get drinking!"

In a way, he found her excitement to be cute. Levi sighed, "Give me ten minutes."

**+++**

There was still a week left before his ODM gear would see any real action, but he still decided to wear them for the night. The weight of his blades made him feel more like himself.

They entered the tavern and went for the back, finding the dining room and the spare room branching off of it empty. They chose the spare room. Once Levi returned with two mugs of beer, Hange began to fill him in on the news she brought.

"Earlier today, I was cross-checking our weapons inventory from the last battle we had with the Beast Titan. Everything checks out except for one item on the list." She set the paper on the table and pointed to an entry circled in red. "An A-SED has gone missing. I'd initially packed 300. Now, there's only 299."

Levi hadn't heard of it before. "What's an A-SED?"

Hange beamed proudly. "An A-SED is short for 'Anti-Sensory-Explosive-Device'. It's one of the only inventions that I could develop with such little time I had to observe Bean. When thrown, the canister releases a highly concentrated blast of a combined mixture of capsaicin and a cyanocarbon plus a filler of potassium nitrate and aluminum to temporarily disable a titan's ability to see and hear."

"A combined stun grenade with a blinder then." He nodded, impressed. "It would allow a Scout to escape if grabbed."

"That was the intention anyway." She shrugged. "I intended every Scout to carry one to use as a last-ditch resort. I was hoping to test it on the titans during our last battle..." Her words dropped off into silence and she didn't need to explain.

No one could have predicted that the Beast Titan would have shredded down their entire force with rock shrapnel.

"Do you remember seeing anyone when you visited the armory?"

"Not when I spoke with Erwin." Levi shook his head, feeling guilt at the memory of the commander. He paused. "Connie was there as well. He was inventorying the cloth supplies."

He didn't truly suspect the boy, though. Connie was a good fighter and more honest than most. But if it was between him and the late commander, he would be the more likely culprit.

The barkeep entered the room. He was middle aged and wore an eye-patch. His leg must have been lame because he shuffled wherever he went. Hange stuffed the list back into her pocket as he set down a tray holding two shot glasses filled to the brim with copper colored liquid. "On the house for you Scouts. Thank you for liberating our home."

Hange's eyes glittered at the gesture. "Thank you! It was our honor." 

Levi nodded and echoed her. "It was an honor." 

After a grateful bow, the man left the room. Hange lifted her shot glass and nodded for Levi to do the same. "To the Scouts. May our fallen comrades forever be at peace."

They toasted and dumped the liquor down their throats.

As Hange came up for air, making a face, there was a pocket of laughter from a crowd that had just seated themselves in the other room.

Levi could only see the back of one of the party, but he heard Eren's arrogant voice among them. He was joined by a group of what could only be the remainder of the Garrison regiment. The rose emblem on the coat was too tattered to belong to a newly inducted recruit.

Eren's boasting monologue was like needles to his ears, "--like you wouldn't believe! The ladies can't get enough of my titan ability. It's all about the power. At least that's what Sasha told me anyway."

Levi suppressed an urge to roll his eyes. He didn't want Hange to think he was doing it at her. He knew he shouldn't continue to listen in, but at the kid's volume, he was impossible to ignore.

He should have known better. The fool ran his mouth even when sober. It was only to be expected that a few drinks would bring a deluge of arrogance and idiocy.

"In fact, every time we do it, I'm always rough. I love making Mikasa cry for me."

There was a low murmur that sounded like a question due to a tilt at the end.

"What do you mean?" Eren asked defensively. "Of course she likes it."

An sharp crack met Levi's ears followed by a light splatter of droplets on his chin. He looked down at the shot glass shattered in his fist. He didn't realize he had been squeezing it that hard. Luckily the glass shards spared his palm, only nicking blood from his thumb knuckle.

"Levi?" Hange asked.

When he didn't reply, she recognized Eren's voice too and began to listen in.

"Mikasa will tell me to stop, but she loves it." Then he added on a the brink of a laugh, "Otherwise why would she keep coming back?"

Levi felt his blood boil at the staccato of agreeing laughter that followed.

The last time Levi saw Mikasa was twenty days ago. It felt like a lifetime. He could still remember the way she looked as she confessed to him like it was yesterday. Easily the strongest, most agile fighter on the Levi Squad, she lowered her chin, vulnerable, and seemed to fold into herself as she said:

_"With him, I feel like I have no choice."_

_How many times did he take her against her will?_ Levi wondered, clenching his blood speckled fist. He was starting to shake with anger. _How many times?_

Hange sensed the inevitable storm. "No, Levi." She grabbed his shoulder with an imperceptible shake of her head. "Don't."

He shook her off. Good intentions, but far too late.

**+++**

Levi didn't remember being able to move that fast. 

But the next time he blinked, he was no longer in the spare room with Hange. He was charging and drove his shoulder into Eren's chest, knocking the boy off the chair. 

His fist seemed to rise and fall on its own, slamming into Eren's face, punctuating his every word with blood splatter. "You. Fucking. Piece. Of. Shit!"

Levi was seeing red and he blamed the liquor for not being able to dodge the elbow in time. Eren caught him square in the chin and knocked him to his side. Then he was on top of him, driving a punch into Levi's cheek hard enough for him to taste blood.

"Eren! Levi!" Hange's shouts could barely be heard over the scuffle. "Stop this!"

Levi sunk his fist deep into Eren's gut when they were pulled apart. But a crowd was no match for what had just begun. They'd have better luck trying to contain a dynamite blast with their bare hands.

He tore out of their grip by deploying his ODM gear and tackled Eren through the window. The glass shattered around them on impact, showering shards on their shoulders and backs as they barrelled through and landed hard on the dirt outside.

Eren staggered to his feet with the uneasy sway of a drunk. Glaring down at the captain, he paused, then turned to run. He jumped and engaged his ODM gear to launch himself into the night air.

Levi leapt to his feet to chase after him. "Don't you fucking run!" He shouted.

Long ago, Erwin once told him he attributed his astounding ability to take down titans to his speed. Levi believed him. It was how he ascended the ranks so quickly to become Captain. It gave him an advantage. The proof showed itself now. Eren had a head start but in seconds, Levi was nearly shoulder to shoulder with him. Levi made sure to train the Scouts on everything they needed to know to survive. But he didn't give away every ODM move in his arsenal.

Timing it right, Levi deployed his right ODM toward Eren then immediately deployed his left ODM to latch onto the wall behind him. The first ODM claw he deployed zipped past Eren, an inch from his left hip.

"Hah!" Eren grinned over his shoulder, "You missed, Bastard!"

Levi smirked _. I never miss._

He yanked the line to recall the ODM claw and it rocketed back, tangling with Eren's ODM claw when it deployed. The moment the kid realized what happened, the satisfaction Levi felt was almost palpable. Caught off balance, he began to fall and Levi launched himself off the wall to tackle him to the ground.

They tumbled for a minute, wrestling, before Eren staggered to his feet. His bottom lip bled profusely. "You fucking bastard. I'll show you." He stared down at the hand. "I'll show you!"

Levi slowly rose to his feet and a trickle of blood ran down over his right eyelid. He welcomed the blood, welcomed the sting. The adrenaline and pain felt good, as familiar to him as slipping on a pair of broken-in combat boots.

Levi spat blood on the street. "If you want to turn, go ahead. Turn," he dared. 

The moment Eren used his Titan powers against any of them willingly, he was done for. At that point, Levi was allowed to kill him. No exceptions.

Without blinking, Levi pulled his blades out and held them ready. He smirked when the glaring boy slowly raised his hand to his mouth. The kid was no match for him, neither on nor off the battlefield, and they both knew it.

If Eren wanted to die tonight as a titan then so be it.

Levi dug his toes into the street, tensing his shoulders to prepare to charge when he heard a whistling noise above him. He looked up in time to see what looked like a large gray egg drop on the stones between them.

_What is that?_

At first, he thought Eren had thrown it. But the boy froze, staring down at it as confused as he was. The answer came in the form of an explosion.

_BANG!_

The world around them flared with a blinding white light and the force of the explosion knocked them backwards off their feet. Levi gasped in surprise and blinked, finding himself blind. He flailed, realizing he couldn't breathe either. The air had become heavy and each breath felt like he was inhaling acid. 

Choking, Levi pushed himself to his feet. _Run away!_ his brain screamed. _Run away!_

He staggered but only made it a few feet before falling to his knees. He tried to deploy his left ODM but it caught nothing. He couldn't aim it blind. The pain in his lungs was excruciating, gasping for the same air he was choking on.

When he collapsed and his cheek hit the floor, he thought of Mikasa.

**+++**

Levi heard heavy footfalls and the zip of ODM wire. The sounds were muddied as if his head was underwater.

"Go!"

"Go grab Eren!"

Levi blinked and could make out blurry figures closing in on him. He coughed weakly. He blinked again and was relieved to see that his vision seemed to be coming back. 

_Good,_ he thought, _I'm not blind._

He could pick out Jean's voice: "Did you get him? Good! I've got Captain Levi!"

When two arms reached under him to lift him, he was too disoriented to struggle. He closed his eyes again.

**+++**

Levi felt his eyes being forced open and winced at the cold water running over them. Slowly, a blurry form resembling Hange's face swam into view. he blinked his eyes twice and her face sharpened. Hange frowned and lowered the bottle of water. 

"Seriously, Levi?"

He sat up and found his head ached. His mouth was as dry as if he had swallowed sand. "What happened?" When he brought his hand up, he found a bandage above his right eyebrow.

"A few hours ago you and Eren were about to kill each other is what happened." She dumped the rest of the water from the bottle into a glass. She handed it to him with a disapproving look.

"Don't even joke." He scoffed before chugging the entire thing. It stung to swallow. "You know who would have won."

Her anger was gone and she grinned. "Yes, and you would have killed our best asset and the last hope for humanity's survival."

She had a point but it wasn't his fault that their best asset was also mankind's biggest asshole. He remembered the egg-shaped projectile. "Who threw the A-SED?" Levi asked.

"Jean."

That surprised him.

"Surprised me too," She admitted. "He said he was sorry. He wasn't sure what else to do."

Levi frowned. "Why did he have it in the first place?"

"He said he stole it from the armory before our face-off with the Beast Titan because he wasn't sure if he had the guts to fight to the end. He meant to use it when things got really bad to run away. But even after Bertholdt wiped out everyone, he couldn't bring himself to abandon us."

He nodded. "Anything else?"

"We're not welcome in that tavern anymore. Not unless you pay for that window you broke first."

For some reason, that made them burst out laughing. And they couldn't stop. Of all the shit they went through, it seemed like such a ridiculous addition to the endless list of transgressions they'd amassed so far.

* * *

**++ Like what you're reading? Let me know! Kudos/Bookmark/Comment down below! ++**

With Much Love, Seraphy =)


	8. DISCLOSURE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following Levi and Eren's messy public brawl, Mikasa visits Levi with news: Eren has been permanently reassigned to the Military Police to guard the King. And, to Levi's dismay, the MP has also invited Mikasa to join their ranks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Bonus Art for Chapter 8!** By Me (Seraphy) =) 

  
**THE MONTH REPRIEVE OF SCOUT DUTY: DAY 30 of 30**

  
_He wasn't sure how it was possible but the Titans were gaining on them. In seconds, they'd be on top of them! Levi had no choice but to act. He had to fight them._

_NOW!_

Levi shot up in bed, striking out into the darkness to meet the enemy. But he was alone and his swing only tossed his blanket to the floor. The noise he had taken for a distant parade of Titans charging was actually rain. His apartment was dark with the lights off so he couldn't see the rain, but he could hear it.

Even now, the light taps against the window sounded like a clumsy crowd of stomping feet.

He slumped back on his pillow with a sigh and stared at the faint light playing over his ceiling. Erwin once told him that without enough sleep, a man could die. Levi wondered how close he was to that threshhold. He nearly missed the soft knock at his door. 

Then it came again, louder than the rain.

_Thud-thud-Thud_.

Levi pulled on a clean shirt, hit the the lights, and wrenched open the door. He was surprised to see it was pouring out and not the light rain he had assumed. Mikasa stood on his doorstep, drenched, smaller as if beaten down by the rain.

"I have news. Can I come in?"

He nodded and stepped aside. As she pulled her shoes off, he fetched her a towel to dry her hair and noticed she looked worried.

Mikasa took the towel with a smile and ruffled it over her head. "Thanks."

After handing her a cup of tea, he took his place across from her at the table. Levi was surprised at how beautiful she was. Her hair had grown and now fell past her shoulders. And as she sipped, the lashes that bat her cheeks were much fuller than he remembered. His memories of her were fading even after three weeks and they didn't do her justice.

She launched into the reason for her visit. "The Military Police came to the barracks today to see Eren. He's been reassigned to the King's personal guard."

He nodded."I authorized the transfer." The King himself had sent him a posted letter with the request a few days ago. Seeing who it came from, it was more an outright demand than a request. It couldn't have come at a better time.

If Levi had to deal with Eren any longer, he'd strangle him.

Mikasa nodded. "He's packing everything up tonight to ride with them at first light tomorrow."

Levi stood to refill his cup from the kettle. With his back to her, Levi allowed himself to smile. _Bless the Sloth King._ He wasn't good for much but at least he helped to erase that shit stain Eren from his life. He was almost tempted to ask her: _Any other good news?_

Mikasa hesitated. "The MPs also said they have room for me, too."

Levi paused, clenching his jaw. He took a moment to imagine it. A position with the Military Police was highly coveted and rightly so; Mikasa would be safest in the heart of the city beside the king, she'd have a much better quality of life there; she would be able to settle and have a family with Eren, if she wanted.

It also meant this was the last time they'd ever see other again.

Levi lowered his eyes. He couldn't trust himself to be sound convincingly happy, so he forced himself to sound supportive. "You'll be a good addition to their ranks."

At that, he heard Mikasa set her cup down with a loud clink. He turned to see her stand and pull on her battle coat, though he knew this would be the last night she would wear it. She'd hand it over to the armory tomorrow and don the MP coat of arms once she reached Wall Sina.

The thought that her coat would be the last thing he'd have of her made his chest feel heavy.

Levi watched Mikasa tug her hair out from the coat and noticed something odd. She seemed to struggle with the simplest motions. Usually one of his most nimble fighters, she was clumsy. When she moved for the door, her hip accidentally bumped the table corner and sent her cup to the floor. The cup bounced, spilling tea on carpet and wood. She barely drank any of it going by the size of puddle.

Mikasa ignored it and went straight for the door. Had it been anyone else, Levi would have shook his head and knelt to clean the mess first, but his instinct pushed him to follow her.

He caught her arm at the door. "Mikasa." She didn't reply, only kept her face turned away from him towards the darkness outside.

"Mikasa." He pulled her back into the dim light of his apartment and was surprised to see she was crying. Tears glistened on her cheeks and as he watched, more kept coming. She moved to leave again but he shoved her against the door and pinned her there.

"Why are you crying?" He said. Levi's eyes darkened to the black hue of an angry sea. "Did Eren hurt you again?"

_I'll fucking kill him_. Instinctively, his hand went for his thigh where his blade usually was but found empty air. His swords had been taken off him by Hange for safe keeping. Smart. Hange knew not to trust him with them when Eren was still in reach.

"No," she confessed.

His shoulders dropped. "Then why are you crying?" She refused to meet his eyes again even when he held her chin toward him. He narrowed his eyes, confused. "Mikasa, you should be happy you have another chance to become an MP. You were the top of your class. You should have joined their ranks in the first place rather than become a Scout."

"Would you have been happier if I had?"

He shook his head. "I don't understand. What does this have to do with me?"

Mikasa seemed to cave, "Everything." Her face cracked and she cried harder, beating a hand against his chest. "Are you happy that I'm leaving too?"

And there it was. The truth behind her unhappiness. It wasn't fear of whether she was unfit to be an MP or a worry that she would miss her life as a Scout too much. Or even worry about her future with Eren. It was because she thought he didn't care.

Levi lifted his hand and slid his fingers through her wet hair to pull her closer. He pressed his mouth to hers and felt the same, warm suppressed hunger overtake him. She tasted of tea with the light sweetness of rainwater. "I never said I was happy about it," he confessed, pulling back. "But I understand if you love Eren and want to follow him."

"But I don't." Then she clarified, "I don't love Eren."

Levi stared at her in silence. He couldn't have heard her right.

"That's why I was with him in the forest. I wanted to see if it felt the same with him as it did with you. I needed to know." She shook her head, thinking back. "But it didn't. I took me so long to realize what that meant."

"You came here to tell me this?" For a long time, Levi was certain his ultimatum had poisoned any future he had with her. There was a strong chance that Mikasa would never be able to untangle her sense of duty from how she truly felt. He had long ago accepted that he would never see her again.

She nodded, "Yes."

That was all Levi needed to hear. He pulled her back into his apartment, closing the door and locking it behind them.

* * *

**++ Like what you're reading? Let me know! Bookmark/kudos/comment down below! ++**

With Much Love, Seraphy =)


	9. VINDICATION

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **|| CHAPTER WARNING: EXPLICIT SEX SCENE!! ||**
> 
> After Mikasa's confession, Levi decides to show her first-hand how sex should be enjoyed, not endured.

**|| CHAPTER WARNING: EXPLICIT SEX SCENE!! ||**

* * *

Only seconds after he threw the bolt on the door, Levi backed Mikasa against it. He pressed his mouth against hers and found he had been starving for the taste. His hands traced over her body to free her of her clothes, unbuttoning, pulling, lifting, and even tearing until he'd sent them to fall to the floor with the rain.

"Take off your shirt," she breathed.

Levi obeyed and grabbed the lip of his shirt to pull it back over his head. Then he crouched to lift her against him and felt her legs cross at his back, drawing him tightly against her heat. The sultry, vanilla-like scent of her skin made him feel almost lightheaded. He pressed soft kisses against her neck and heard her breathing quicken.

He meant to carry her to the bed, but they didn't make it. The back of his legs hit the edge of the table as he backed up, forcing him to sit to break their fall. He barely noticed his cup clatter to the floor to join hers when Mikasa straddled him, setting her knees on either side of him on the wet tabletop.

Impatient, Mikasa pulled his pants down until they fell to his feet. Then she hooked two fingers under her panties and dragged them to side. Biting her bottom lip, she positioned herself above him and at an agonizingly slow pace, let herself sink down onto his cock. As the head penetrated her wet slit, Levi grit his teeth, sharply exhaling.

Before she had gotten far, her body jerked upward again and he watched the head reappear, glistening with her juices.

His hands flew to her hips, his fingertips digging in for a firm grip. As he guided her hips down to take more of him, he caught the hiss that escaped her lips. Levi looked up to see Mikasa's eyes pinched closed in pain. Her nails bit into the flesh of his shoulders and back. Fighter that she was, he watched Mikasa exhale deeply and try to sink down further despite the obvious pain.

_She's trying to force herself through it,_ he realized, _for my benefit._

Immediately, Levi's hand caught hold beneath her jaw to stop her. When Mikasa opened her eyes to question him he shook his head gently: _No._

"You don't need to pretend to enjoy it," he said. "Not with me." 

_I'm not Eren._

Worry played over her face, so he kissed her for reassurance. Then he lay back to rest his back flat against the table, guiding her down so that they lay face to face. Gently, he nudged her to crawl forward on her elbows and knees until her sex hovered inches above his chin. Levi's hands traced over the soft curves of her backside and pushed her down to bring her closer. Then, holding her steady, he lifted his head to slowly lick her soft pink folds.

At the touch of his tongue, Mikasa's gasp punctured the silence. The table shifted beneath them as she gripped the edge. Levi smirked and rewarded her with a second and third deep lick, tracing around her clit each time, and she shuddered, spreading her legs wider for him. He continued with slow deliberate licks until her body began to undulate against him, bucking against his mouth. Only then did he trace two fingers against her slit to check if she was ready. He continued licking and checking, only satisfied when his fingertips came away not just damp, but glossy wet.

Levi sat up, pressing his mouth against her breasts. He was circling his tongue to stiffen the second plum-colored nub when Mikasa decided to try again. This time, his efforts were well rewarded.

She slid down his entire length with a gasp, locking onto his cock in a hot, wet vice that drew a growl from the bottom of his throat. Keeping his eyes trained on her gunmetal gray irises, Levi lifted Mikasa's hips and gently rolled his body to enter her again in a slow, deliberate motion.

She reached down between her legs, tracing her fingers in practiced circles over her clit. Levi groaned as the sight of her enjoying herself. Mikasa was beautiful. Aroused, her parted lips darkened to a rose color. Her full breasts rose and fell with each panting breath. It excited him even more to know this was exactly how she looked touching herself in private.

After a moment, she nodded. Levi understood. Monitoring her face the entire time, he slowly drew himself out and thrust deep inside her.

"Ohh," Mikasa gasped. Her lips pressed against his neck, muffling the sound. He winced at the nails raking across his back; the sting was both painful yet pleasing.

He exhaled hard. Then withdrew and thrust inside her again. He groaned at the her tightness and the sheer pleasure flooding through his core, "Fuck." _That feels good._

Levi barely resisted his sudden urge. He wanted to grab her waist, slam her against him with hungry, merciless slaps against his hips to fuck her faster and deeper. But he reined in the animal hunger. Instead he rested his hands at her waist and let her control the pace. Mikasa began slowly rocking her body, taking him in deeper and deeper each time.

Mikasa's circling fingers began to quicken their pace over her clit and with it, her gasps. "Fuck," she breathed. The pupils of her gray eyes dilated, locking on his own as she whimpered, "Ohh, fuck, Levi."

She was close. The delicate muscles above her stomach flexed and tensed as she panted. Her walls were gripping him in an even tighter vice around his cock as she rocked. Whether or not he could help it, Levi knew he was quickly being dragged closer and closer towards his own inevitable climax. He closed his eyes to fight the urge. But then he decided to keep them open; he wanted to see Mikasa's face as she came.

It happened suddenly. Mikasa threw her head back, arching her back as she came, shuddering. As her thighs tensed, Levi gripped her waist firmly with both hands and angled his hips to thrust upwards in quick strokes inside her, and she cried out his name. He continued thrusting as she came, wanting to draw out every moan from her shivering body that he could.

When she lifted herself off him, he reached down to finish himself off. But her hand stopped him.

"Allow me," she said.

She started first by licking her juices off him before taking him inside her mouth. Then before he could utter a word she swallowed him, taking his head down the back of her throat. It was easy for Levi to finally let go, and with his fingers woven through the dark tangles of her hair, he came.

\+ + +

_This is perfect,_ Levi thought. 

He knew full well that even if he took a step back, he'd still see his life as it truly was -- a smoking wreckage of rubble and fallen comrades -- but he couldn't deny himself this either. This moment in time was perfect. He would be happy to live in it for the rest of his life.

He tilted his head to look at Mikasa. She lay beside him with her cheek pressed to the table, her damp bangs splayed over her eyes. When he met her eyes, she smiled. Levi gently brushed her bangs aside.

"I love you," he whispered low.

Nothing ever caught Levi off guard. Not even his love for her. 

He had seen coming; it was as if he stood on the other end of a mile-long flat meadow facing down the impending truth. It hadn't charged at him like a mindless titan, every step closer filling him with dread, but instead, it approached with the gentleness of dawn. At first, he'd tried to resist it. He squinted against the first few rays of Mikasa's smiles as they poked holes through his gloom. But as more time passed with his world getting brighter, he realized fighting it was futile and let himself drown in the warmth of her sunlight, basking in the beauty of it all.

* * *

  


Bonus End Story Art by Me. Gotta love the imagery of Levi finally accepting the internal sunrise that is Mikasa...

**EDIT (SEPT 7TH 2020): The Sequel "YET NEVER TO REMEMBER" is up! Link in Chapter 10!**

Hi Everyone, thank you so much for reading my story! 

This is the end of the journey for Levi and Mika for now. I hope you enjoyed every chapter ;) I need to return back to my project that I've been using this short story to warm-up/procrastinate with, so I thank you all for giving me a great reason to keep writing. 

Originally, I meant for this story to be six chapters but since it was so well received, I bumped it up to nine. If there's enough call for me to continue, I may continue the series at a later time (perhaps to coincide with the release of season four). What kind of conflicts would you like to see in the future? 

Let me know in the comments :) 

With much love, 

Seraphy 


	10. Part 2: All but Forgotten, Yet Never to Remember

_Amazing news my dear Readers! I've gone on to begin the Sequel!_

Part 2: [All but Forgotten, Yet Never to Remember](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26310679)

((More In-depth notes are covered in the link detailing the changes to the story structure: This time it will have BOTH Levi & Mikasa POV))

The sequel ' **Yet Never to Remember** ' uncovers the reason behind why Mikasa left Levi and the Scouts to join Eren as an MP. It also explores what happens to the pair when Eren and Sasha decide they'll do anything to sabotage their happiness.

Also, there's more art! Happy Reading :)!!

**Much Love,**

**Seraphy**


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